Favorite essay of the three.

The essay I enjoyed reading most was Malcolm X's. I feel that his writing style is inviting to the reader. Again, he has a point to get across, but the essay is still conversational. It speaks volumes about the things he learned in his time spent in prison. Aside from the tone of the essay, Malcolm's essay was also, I feel, the most descriptive. When Malcolm details reading after "lights out" I could really see it. Not only that, but it provides the tiniest glimpse into his life before prison. As a reader, I was curious as to what exactly happened "in the streets."

"At one hour intervals the night guards paced past every room. Each time I heard the approaching footsteps, I jumped into bed and feigned sleep. As soon as the guard passed, I got back out of bed onto the floor area of that light-glow, where I would read for another fifty-eight minutes - until the guard approached again. That went on until three or four every morning  Three or four hours of sleep night was enough for me. Often in the years in the streets I had slept less than that."

Above all, Malcolm X's paper was inspirational. He turned a bad situation into an opportunity. He wholeheartedly threw himself into learning to read. Even though it was hard, even though he struggled, he persevered. He pushed himself to learn. I enjoyed reading it. I said previously in a blog post that I was disappointed there were only 3 pages. This still holds true, and I plan to find the book and read it. In 3 short pages, he was able to pull me in and leave me wanting for more. I think that's something that all writers strive to do.

Differences Between Essays

The biggest difference between Malcolm X's, Franklin's, and Rose's essays is the voice in which it was written. Franklin's paper is very formal and proper. A result of the time in which it was written. It's also pretty hard to read, because of how wordy it is, as well as because of the grammatical differences of that time. Malcolm's paper was less formal. More conversational. He uses a good vocabulary of words, but doesn't lose the reader because of them. His paper was also much more descriptive than Franklin's. Rose's essay is by far the least formal of the three. Rose's essay sounds as if he's speaking at a high school, drawing attention to the issue. I feel that the reason behind the essays are different as well. Malcolm X's and Franklin's essays were excerpts from autobiographies. They were simply to tell a story, one chapter in each person's life. Although, I feel that Malcolm X's essay was in part tied to his activism. I feel that Rose's essay was written more to draw attention to the fact that there are kids, smart kids, who fall through the cracks.

Mike Rose's "I just wanna be average."

1) Describe Rose's life in Voc.Ed. What were his teachers like? Have you ever had experience with teacher like these?

Rose was put into Voc. Ed. because of an error made by the school. His test scores had gotten mixed up with that of another Rose within the system. The Voc. Ed. classroom sounds like a place to dump those students deemed "unteachable" by the school. The Voc. Ed. teachers had given up on their students. It was their job to make sure the kids passed, but they had nothing invested. They didn't care. I haven't really had personal experience with a teacher like this. However, there were a number of kids in my high school class who required special help understanding material and taking tests. These helpers, or paraprofessionals, didn't actually help. They more or less handed kids the answers to the homework and tests. Wrote papers for them and did their big projects.

2) What did Voc. Ed. do to Rose and his fellow students? How did it affect them intellectually, emotionally, and socially? Why was it subsequently so hard for Rose to catch up in math?

Voc. Ed. did nothing good for Rose and his classmates. It gave them the perception that they couldn't learn, so they might as well not even try. It took away any desire any of them had to learn. There were students who were intelligent in Rose's class, like his friend Ted Richard. Ted was intelligent, although he didn't fit into the mold for intelligence, so he was placed into Voc. Ed. The Voc. Ed. kids were isolated from the rest of the school. As such, they were outcast. There was a stigma attached to anyone who was associated with it. I'm sure that emotionally, it was hard. To constantly be told, "You are not smart enough." has to suck. Not only that, but after a while, you begin to take on that identity of "stupid". It personifies you. After his time in Voc. Ed, I can totally understand why Rose would have a hard time catching up in math. He'd been told for so long he couldn't do it, that he began to believe it himself.

3) Why is high school so disorienting to students like Ken Harvey? How does he cope with it? What other strategies do students use to cope with the pressures and judgments they encounter in school?

Ken Harvey was put under the label "common". He dealt with this by just accepting his fate. It was easier for him to go along with it, rather than fight it. I've seen a lot of kids do this. There were a couple of kids in my graduating class who were labeled "bad" kids. They weren't bad. Because they had made mistakes, people had this perception about them that they couldn't shake. No matter how hard those kids tried, it didn't matter. So, I guess as a way to deal with it, they just accepted it. And they truly became bad kids. They smoked at lunch, they skipped class, and they didn't do their homework. It became their identity. In high school there is nothing more valuable than an identity or sense of self, a voice. These kids had been given an identity, and they accepted it. At least it was better than being nobody. I've also seen the attitude of "I don't care" even when you know they do. Not caring takes away the expectation of doing well, if you don't try, you can't fail.

4) What, if anything, do you find disorienting about college? What steps can students take to lessen disorientation?

The thing I found most disorienting about college is just the mix of different people that exist within the classroom. I haven't been in school for 5 years, and even then, the school I came from did not hold a variety of people. I struggle with feeling like I can't compare to other students or that I'm not on the same level as far as intelligence goes. I have had classes with 18 year olds who I feel are much, much smarter than me. I have the tendency to sit back a little until I've reached some level of comfort with the class. This is something that I'm dealing with personally. It's just taking me time to get used to it.

5) How does your experience of education compare (or contrast, or both) to Mike Rose's?

I had quite the opposite experience in high school. I was lazy, and honestly, a little scared of failure, so I didn't really try. I constantly had teachers pushing me to do better. I took a geometry class my sophomore year. I passed every test in that class, but failed, because I never did the homework. My teacher was baffled as to why I wouldn't just do it. My senior year, I had many meetings with the guidance counselor who didn't understand why I wasn't on track to graduate. She wanted to know why such a "bright student" would hold themselves back like that.

Educational Narrative - Final Draft

Two and a half years ago, I was living in Dawson, MN with my boyfriend of 5 years, John. I was 21 and I had 2 children who were under the age of 2. Because I had no family in the area, I had been handling 2 children on my own since the day I left the hospital after the birth of my son. He had acid reflux and was vastly different from my daughter. Violet had been a happy baby. She only ever cried when she was hungry, even then, it was not nearly as bad as the piercing cries that emitted from my tiny 6 pound son. I use the word cry loosely. Screaming bloody murder is probably more accurate. He hardly slept at night, which meant I hardly slept at night. And then I had to wake up and care for a rambunctious 1 year old AND a crabby baby all day. Besides that, my relationship had been falling apart for some time. John wanted me to be a housewife, while he worked, but the reality was that he couldn't handle it. He stopped going to work, leaving us with no money, ever. He also didn't understand the amount of stress I was under with the kids. I was expected to be “super-mom”. After all, I had chosen to have these kids, they were my responsibility. It was not acceptable to ask for help from his family, but I was also under intense scrutiny. They were watching every step, judging every choice.

Things finally reached a breaking point when John's mother told me that I didn't deserve my children. That it would be better for them if I gave them up for adoption. The environment I was living in was suffocating, depressing. I made the choice to leave John. I decided that it was better to be a single mother than to live another day where I was. I called my mom and asked her to help me. She flew to Minnesota to come and get us. Driving away from the house, I could feel the weight being lifted off my shoulders little by little. Every mile further was one mile closer to happiness. When I got to Washington, I moved in with my mom and applied for every program available to me.

For 6 months I lived with her. She helped me as much as possible and I did what I could to help her. She worked full time and had 4 other kids to take care of. My only real contribution to the house was to clean up and cook dinner at the end of the day. I started to get frustrated with my situation. I was glad to be with family, but the feeling of failure was beginning to creep up. I had simply moved from relying on John to provide, to relying on my mom. More and more I began to feel like us being there was an imposition on her.  I finally moved out when I had secured an apartment in a subsidized complex; my rent was adjusted based on my income. I was working with the state through a program called KCR. On my first day, I was beyond excited. I hadn't worked in a year. I was overwhelmed with the possibilities and opportunities I had. KCR put me into a volunteer position working with Developmentally Disabled adults, with a company called Communitas. The reality of being a single mother hit me then. I took my kids to daycare, went to work, picked them up, made dinner, played with them, gave baths and brushed teeth, read books, and off to bed they went. Then I took care of the house before finally crashing at the end of the night. I was doing everything on my own again. I had been spoiled by living with my mom. Now it was just me, with 2 kids, a job, and a house to take care of.

Little by little things became easier. Every day was better than the last, I was a little less exhausted, I was a little bit closer to “making it”. I was working towards the goal of providing a good life for my kids, and that included college. I had walked in graduation in 2007, but I hadn't actually received my diploma. I had missed it by 2 credits. Through KCR, I was able to attain my GED. I pushed through the entire self-paced curriculum in 2 weeks and got nearly perfect scores on all my tests. After I had gotten my GED, the company that I was volunteering with hired me. I had only been volunteering with them for 2 months, which was much less than the usual 6 months of volunteering. I was given a position at one of their adult family homes in Silverdale. I excelled in my new job. I loved it. Caring for people had always been a passion of mine. Through Communitas, I was able to complete all the necessary training to work in an adult family home. I worked with Communitas for 6 months successfully. I loved every minute of it. I felt like things were finally falling into place for me. I was finally taking care of things on my own, and doing it well. I was happier than I had been in a long time.

The bottom fell out when I lost my job in January of 2011. I had lost the job through no fault of my own, simply to circumstances beyond my control. I'll admit, I was heartbroken. I had worked so hard to get where I was, and in one phone call, it was gone. For 6 months, I searched for a job with no luck. Finally, and just in the nick of time, I got a job working with a cleaning company. It was not ideal in the least, but a job is a job and beggars can't be choosers. I quickly gained regulars who loved me and earned 3 raises within 3 months. I hated my job, but I was good at it.

Things were going good for me again. I was working, and taking care of my kids. But I found that I was not doing much besides that. I had been single for 2 years, and I was finally in a place where I felt I could give time to something and someone else. I met my boyfriend, Michael, online. He was amazing from day one. After less than a month of dating, I took a risk and moved in with him. It quickly became apparent that Michael was the complete opposite of John. Whereas I was left to my own devices with John, Michael became my partner. He was someone that I could fall back on, someone to share my thoughts with at the end of the day. He quickly took on the responsibility of being a father to my kids. Every day I am thankful that I found him. I registered for classes at OC for the 2012 Fall Quarter. I felt like I had made it. Finally, all this time this is what I had been working towards. I registered with the full support of my family and Michael. Life was good.

Then reality struck again. In October, I lost a man I had known as my grandpa. His brain was without oxygen for over 10 minutes, and though paramedics had revived his body, it was too late to save him. Grandma had to make the choice to take him off of life support. We all gathered around him and said good-bye. Once they had taken him off the ventilator, his body tried to breath for the next hour and a half. Nobody had expected it. The doctors had advised us that it would happen fairly quickly. The sound of his body struggling for breath is one that I will never be able to erase from my memory.

Shortly after this, I found out that my younger sister had been depressed and had been cutting herself to cope. I received a phone call late one night, my mother asking me to go and sit with my younger brothers while she took Kelsey to the emergency room. Kelsey had been in her room writing good-bye letters to all of us and was planning to kill herself. She was later admitted into an inpatient facility. I lost focus in school. I stopped going, stopped doing homework. I stopped going to work. I just...stopped. It has taken time to work through things, and I'm still working through them. I registered for Winter Quarter, went back to work, and here I am.

Over the last 2 years, I have dealt with a lot of things. I have learned that it is okay to ask for help sometimes. When I think back to the situation that I was living in before I moved here, I am so happy that I made that phone call to my mom. Had I not asked for help at that time, I don’t know where I would be now. I had to set aside my pride and just accept the help where I could get it. That is a lesson that I am still learning. I have learned that life is not fair. Sometimes, no matter how hard you work, things just don’t work out. Sometimes people are taken from our lives, or terrible things happen to people we love. It’s important to let yourself be sad and angry, but not wallow in it. I have learned that things do get better. When you’ve hit the bottom, there is nowhere to go but up. Above all, I have learned that I am capable, I am strong, and I am deserving of a good life. Today, I went to work at a job I love. Today, I went to school and was able to get work done. Today, I came home to two happy, beautiful, smiling kids and a man who loves me. Today, life is good.

Group Topics

Marijuana. Cannabis. Mary-Jane. Weed. Ganja. Marijuana has a lot of different names. It’s got a pretty recognizable shape. The leaves are green with 5 thin fingers. It’s also got a pretty distinct smell. My roommate smokes weed and her entire half of the house smells like old weed and McDonalds. Interestingly enough, while weed is illegal in the United States, it’s never been linked to an overdose death. Compare that with cigarettes, which are known to cause cancer, and alcohol, which is known to cause impairment in judgment and is responsible for many deaths every year.

Cell phones are pretty much a staple in any given person’s daily life. Cell phones are similar to a drug. We are all addicted. When I first got a cell phone, I didn’t realize how much I would use it. Now, I can’t leave the house without it. And when I do, it’s like a little piece of me is missing because I use it for everything. I don’t even own a home phone. Cell phones are also pretty similar to a house phone. Only you can take it places with you and use it wherever. Cell phones are pretty demanding, if you think about it. We’ve all trained ourselves to jump at any buzz or ring. We have to charge it every night, sometimes more often. It begs us to check its Facebook and Gmail. Cell phones are actually kind of like a needy boyfriend or girlfriend. It’s a dependent relationship. Almost abusive. Cell phones make us believe that we can’t live without them, that we’ll never find anyone else, and that without them, we have nothing. Cell phones are kind of dicks that way. Cell phones are also similar to computers. Only they fit into your pocket. At least, now they do. They used to be giant things that you had to carry around which I kind of feel like kind of took away the convenience of it.  Cell phones are similar to beepers and pagers. Only smarter, and cooler. And less of a throwback to the 90s.

The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin

Franklin's paper was tedious to read. I know that it's the product of the time in which it was written, but my god is it wordy. He takes an awfully long time to say something. By the end of the sentence, I was no longer interested, I was just wondering WHEN it would be over. lol. His vocabulary is broad. He supplies examples and anecdotes to draw the reader in. It is interesting to see the style of writing and some of the grammatical differences the paper has, as compared to the proper style of writing today.

In contrast to Malcolm X's paper, this paper is not user friendly. While he does include anecdotes and such, the paper is still pretty stiff. Which I guess is par for the course for that time. Casual was different then, if it existed at all, I don't know. Or maybe that just represents who he was as a person. Maybe he was just a super formal guy. Malcolm's paper has a much more casual tone to it, regardless of the fact that it's a serious topic.

Beyond the fact that both are about learning to read and how they used that to their benefit, there aren't too many similarities between these papers. They both feature the use of a large vocabulary. They both provide examples to paint a picture. For example, Malcolm tells the reader about reading during the night and pretending to be asleep when the guards came around. Franklin tells about how he secretly borrowed books and returned them before anyone noticed they were missing.

Overall, each paper serves as a good example of an educational narrative. Despite my personal preference for Malcolm's paper over Franklin's, neither paper is "bad". Franklin's paper is simply a product of his time, and as such, it's harder to read and relate to.

Malcolm X's "Learning to Read"

First of all, his story is amazing. While others may have given up because it was hard, Malcolm X persevered and taught himself to read. I personally feel that his attitude is a rare thing to see today. As it pertains to education especially. I feel that passion and desire to learn is the exception and not the rule. That's not to say that there aren't students out there who don't want to learn. Look around at OC and you'll see all the Running Start students, who clearly worked their butts off to get to where they are and are still working hard. Or those who are continuing their education, having graduated high-school many years ago. Not to exclude anyone else, because we all have our reasons for being here and we're all working hard.

In regards to how I can use this as a model for my own educational narrative, Malcolm X's "Learning to Read" is a great example. The tone of his paper is casual. It's almost as if you're having a conversation with him. Despite having that feeling, his paper is a testament to the things he learned in his time in prison. His vocabulary is broad and rich. I found myself wanting to read more, disappointed that there were only 3 pages. His paper accomplishes what it intends to. It is a great example of an educational narrative in that I can clearly picture him sitting in his cell, copying out words from the dictionary as well as sitting in the dim light from the hallway, reading after lights out.

How to get an A. (Anna Riley)

Aside from the obvious, don't plagiarize and follow the MLA style, we feel that an A worthy paper will start with a topic that was an educational experience for you.  We want to begin at the point of interest, and then revert back to the beginning. We want to make sure that the narrative is written with all events in order so it’s clear to the reader. Throughout the paper, we want to illustrate the story with plenty of detailed examples and dialogue. The only way we can do this is by using our own voice and applying our personality to the paper. In Feross Aboukhadiejeh’s story, he applies his sense of humor that makes the reader feel as if they can relate to it. We need to make sure that we apply the same sense of familiarity to a wide-ranged audience and not an exclusive age group. Due to the informality of the paper, we do not need an unnecessary thesis and can speak from first person. By following the above, one has the ability to achieve an A on this first paper.

Pre-writing

While I'm aware that pre-writing is a great way of working towards writing a good paper, I can't. I never have. I find that when I pre-write, the words become false and boring. I edit too much. I second guess things. I have NEVER been able to sit down and write the way I'm "supposed to". The most I've ever done is jot down ideas. I've never really done an outline or anything. And even when I did, it was only to please my teacher. Then I ended up changing the entire paper later. Maybe I've been lucky up until this point. In high-school, 99% of my papers (and big projects) were done the night before. I'd get an idea, or a sentence would pass through my mind and I'd be inspired to write 5 pages.

I'm also a super fail at writing research papers. I can write an opinion paper that would knock your socks off, as long as I'm at least interested in the subject at hand, but I just never got the detail work down.

Not that this has really anything to do with what the blog post is supposed to be about, but, I'm a little wary of writing these posts and having other people in the class read them. While 99% of the time I feel like I'm 30, I feel a little naive when it comes to school. I don't feel like I'm on the same level as other people. So posting like this is nerve wracking because I don't want to sound stupid.

Anyway, I apparently have a tendency to get off course in my writing so I should probably end this before it gets weird. lol.

Feross v. Spectrum

It really is hard to read things that I have absolutely NO interest in, and I love reading. Feross' "How I learned to program computers" is boring. So, ridiculously boring. That said, it provides a good point of reference for judging "How I learned to live Google free". The two blog posts are vastly different.

 Feross' post was very straightforward. He didn't really waste much time trying to draw readers in. Which I guess isn't really his intention, seeing as if you're reading it, you must really be interested in him or learning how to program. His post was pretty much in order as far as a timeline goes, but the information means little to anyone who doesn't already know something about the topic at hand. Truth be told, I have no clue what any of the acronyms stand for.

The post about learning to live Google free was actually interesting. It was informative, yes, but not boring. I find it more than a little ironic that we are using Google blogger to write about said blog post. But I was actually able to read all 6 pages and not just skim, which I'll admit, I did while reading Feross' post.

As this applies to my own educational narrative, I have a good example of what not to do. I don't think Feross' style of writing is one that I'll want to model my own paper after.